I woke up at three in the morning again last night, sweating buckets. This same dream has been chasing me for weeks: I am behind the steering wheel of my old sedan, the radio is buzzing with static, and suddenly the concrete road beneath me just vanishes. I feel that stomach-flipping drop as the car plunges off a massive bridge into dark water. It feels so real that I can almost smell the salt and the old air freshener hanging from my rearview mirror. I decided to stop just wondering about it and actually sat down today to track my thoughts and figure out what my brain is trying to tell me.
First, I grabbed my messy notebook and started writing down every single detail I could remember before they faded. I realized that in the dream, I wasn’t even scared of the water; I was terrified of the moment I lost control of the wheel. I looked back at my past month at the office. We have been pivoting to a new project management system, and I’ve been feeling like a passenger in my own career. That was the first “aha” moment. Driving off a bridge isn’t usually about a literal car crash. For me, it was the feeling of being pushed onto a path I didn’t choose.
The Bridge is the Connection
I spent the afternoon digging through some old forums and talking to a buddy of mine who’s big into psychology. I started connecting the dots. Bridges are just links between point A and point B. If you are falling off one, it means your “transition” is failing. I looked at my life and saw exactly where the bridge was broken. I’m trying to move from being “the guy who does everything” to being a leader, but the gap feels way too wide. I realized the bridge in my dream represents the pressure of change. When you’re suspended high in the air, you’re vulnerable. One wrong turn and everything goes south.
Next, I looked at the “water” part of the dream. In my notes, I wrote down that the water was murky and cold. Most people say water represents emotions. For me, it was the fear of being overwhelmed by things I can’t handle. I realized I’ve been bottling up a lot of stress about my mortgage and some family drama back home. Falling into the water is basically my mind saying, “Hey, if you don’t slow down, you’re going to drown in all this stuff you’re ignoring.”
Taking Back the Wheel
So, what did I actually do about it? I didn’t just sit there and feel bad. I started by looking at my daily routine. I noticed that I’ve been “autopiloting” my life, just like I was autopiloting that car in the dream. I made a list of three things I can actually control right now. I talked to my boss about the workload, I finally called my sister to settle that old argument, and I started going for walks in the evening to clear my head. I’m trying to prove to my subconscious that I’m the one steering the car again.
- Control the transition: If life feels too fast, slow down the “car” before you hit the bridge.
- Check the pillars: Make sure your support system—friends, family, or even your own mental health—is solid.
- Don’t fear the splash: Even if you do fall, you can usually swim back to shore if you don’t panic.
Last night was the first night in a long time that I didn’t dream about crashing. I still dreamt about a bridge, but this time, the sun was out, and I stayed in my lane. It sounds silly to some, but documenting these “nightmares” really helped me see the cracks in my real life. If you’re seeing the same thing, don’t just ignore it. Your brain is a messy, loud place, and sometimes it has to scream at you through a car crash just to get you to listen to what’s actually bothering you during the day.
